I love Scott Adams.

When it comes to picking our next president, I can’t decide if I
prefer the smooth-talking, inspirational candidate who promises to give
my money to people who don’t work as hard as I do, or the old, short,
ugly, angry guy with one good arm who graduated at the bottom of his
class and somehow managed to shag a hot heiress and become a contender
for president. It seems dangerous to underestimate that guy.