It looks as if The Family Dollar won’t be renewing its lease on Prospect Street.
I am thrilled about this development. Hopefully, some upscale gym will move in. This will enable me to do 2 things:
- Regain my manly figure
- Rebuild my fragile ego by inviting city-folk out to the suburbs and impressing them with the high-end retail establishments surrounding our apartment
That said, we really do love the location of our apartment. The bars and restaurants on Bedford are sufficient to keep us amused for months. And they keep getting better.
But there are some very strange holdover stores clinging to their leases in this gentrifying area. For example, I know where you can find stuffed rats decked out in fur coats, Asian-flavored christmas figurines, and the best damn porn in Stamford. The worst offender though is The Family Dollar, which is located directly outside our window.
The place is rundown and depressing and they don’t offer a single item that I would buy. We’ve reformed ourselves from stupid young people into mature bargain hunters, so this isn’t my inner snob talking. It’s just that the store sells expired, damaged CRAP and they don’t maintain the building very well.*
Anyway, I can’t wait to see who takes over the lease. I’m hoping for Equinox gym or a science fiction book store.
*Furthermore, they attract all kinds of riff-raff that don’t deserve to breathe the same air that I breathe.
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